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Post by Deleted on Dec 12, 2011 22:42:35 GMT -5
Haha. Can you guess who the other witches are? Okay dokey. That's fine with me.  |
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Post by Moonlight on Dec 12, 2011 22:47:14 GMT -5
Stephan is also obvious. Wouldn't be surprised if Kameron was one, either.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 12, 2011 22:48:41 GMT -5
You're right. Kam is one. There are two others.
Is it bad it's that obvious?
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Post by Moonlight on Dec 12, 2011 22:53:50 GMT -5
It depends on what you're going for. Is this a children's (age-wise) targeted book? Or is it Teen, YA, or Adult? (I seriously doubt the last, though.)
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Post by Deleted on Dec 12, 2011 22:55:44 GMT -5
Teen. Like for 13 and up.
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Post by Moonlight on Dec 13, 2011 9:17:18 GMT -5
Then you'll want to make it a little more subtle, unless you're going with the regularly dumbed down Teen fiction.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 13, 2011 9:53:27 GMT -5
Yeah, I'm not trying for the dumb down teen fiction. I'll try to tone it down. Any tips?
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Post by Moonlight on Dec 13, 2011 12:48:18 GMT -5
I'd suggest making the magical hints less obvious, more of a "is it magical, or is it mundane?" thing when you include them at first. As for conversations - The unicorn subject. Guys being completely silent when told they might exist, in a 'dark' manner, is a tell tale give away. That right there screams that Rini is being dense not to notice something is up. Not what you want.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 13, 2011 15:10:25 GMT -5
Oh, okay. That's makes sense. Do you think it's too early to start with into Stephen's point of view? Like a chapter of Rini's and then switch to Stephen's and keep doing that since I have the ending written and the book ends in Stephen's POV.
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Post by Moonlight on Dec 13, 2011 21:16:15 GMT -5
If Stephan is your main antagonist, yes, it's a bit too early to get into his head for the reader. You'll want to pace yourself, unless you can write so well from his PoV that you fool the reader.
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